Fatherhood – The change of a routine


Well, over the past two years, my role has changed drastically from being a single-can have time for a lot of things-person, to someones husband, and now, an upgraded to becoming ones father. Single people may not understand it, but I bet those with kids would know that your life does take a huge shift when you have a kid.  In fact, what I am revealing here might just be peanuts compared to some other amazing parents whom are really working hard to make time for work and their family, so let me first and foremost say that this post is not me complaining about my life. It’s just a brief insight of how parenthood has changed my daily routine. (Wrote that in bold so that you note this)

In my case, it’s a very huge shift in my timetable and life as there’s only three of us at home; my wife, Carissa and myself, so I can’t simply bolt away to some ad-hoc parties friends plan, nor can I simply agree to attend events or meetings if its told to me at the very last minute. As a father, my family comes first now, and the rest can work themselves in my timetable when I’m available.  While I have a few hours at night to blog and do whatever I need to do online, my hours during the day are pretty much very occupied.

The daily routine starts at 5:30AM when I wake up and prepare myself for work, while my wife preps Carissa for an early morning journey to her babysitter at about 6AM. I leave pretty early for work and only get off after a good seven hours or so in the office, in which I would rush to pick Carissa up from her babysitter’, with hope I could avoid the traffic jam that starts at 5PM.

I live in Matang Jaya, and the babysitter (whom happens to be a friends mother) stays somewhere near Sekama Road, so avoiding the jam is quite a priority as Carissa can get restless if she seats too long in the baby chair. Most of the times, Carissa would stare into space as she seats quietly in her car baby seat.
Carissa in car seat
Perhaps some might say I’m insane to send my daughter so far, despite the fact that Matang Jaya does have popular childcare centres which are nearer to my house. Nonetheless, as a parent, I feel that I’m more comfortable having my daughter being influenced by those I know personally so that she may grow up to have the value I want, hence my willingness to travel all the way to Sekama.

Anyway, most days, we do beat the traffic jam with myself feeling pretty much beat from the day at work upon reaching home (because my job requires me to walk, stand, talk, run and do so much more). Carissa however, gets pretty excited when she reaches home and demands attention from her dad, which she has not seen for the past eight hours or so.

She would use her baby voice to call me loudly if I left her alone to do some house errands, and would cry for attention if I was nearby. Most days, I will play with her upon reaching home until she tires and sleeps. This opportunity allows me to also take a nap (and recharge), but its quite usual that the nap would not last more than an hour as Carissa does seem to be pretty sensitive to sound when she takes her day naps.
Carissa on bed alone
My wife works during office hours, and it’s basically my task to entertain Carissa until she returns home.  If Carissa decides to shorten her day nap, or decides to stay awake, it is quite impossible for me to do anything (like make calls, reply emails, write blog post etc) as I am busy entertaining my little girl.

This means any messages, emails or whatever pressing things (which include unfinished things at work I need to do ASAP) would only be replied with short answers at that very moment, or will be delayed until night, which is when my wife would take care of Carissa while I do whatever it is I need to do, sometimes with me staying up past midnight, hence reducing my sleep time. (This is really bad for my health as the doctor recommends over eight hours of sleep for an adult)

While most days would see me able to put Carissa to sleep, and hence allowing me to get that vital nap I need, there are moments when I am just too tired, and I fall right asleep with Carissa still wide awake beside me. Lucky for me that when this happens, Carissa most of the time would entertain herself for a good five minutes before she starts yelling in my ear for me to wake up…hahahahah
Carissa on bed with dad 2
But well, that has been the routine since March this year, and most of the time, the wide smile my daughter produces upon knowing I’m entertaining her just make everything I’m doing, seem so worthwhile.
Carissa head gear
So yeah, I know I’ve slowed down a lot lately, but I guess this is only natural when new responsibilities kick in as a parent.  If you are a parents, able to retain your routine as it was before you became one, please do share your secrets and tips in the comment section below.

However,  mind you that at this very moment, I am not looking at employing anyone as a nanny at my house, nor am I keen to ask a family member to stay in with us because I don’t like troubling people, and I would love to avoid that for as long as I can.



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