Is It Worth To Defy Your Parents?

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I’m so sucked into Gossip Girl that I’ve left the online world and concentrated my whole attention to the TV series.  What I figured would be more of a ‘girlish series’ turned out surprisingly delightful and unconventional.  The story, revolves on Manhattan’s top class teenagers, and how they spend their parent’s wealth with their mind games and manipulation.  It also tells of how difference in stature can effect a relationship, and how two love birds with different stature fall deeply in love despite the odds.  Seriously, Gossip Girl isn’t cheesy, but it’s actually very very delightful to watch.  The drama is played on well, and you take pity on these so called ‘spoilt rich kids’ whom are deprived of family love, but have great bonds in friendship.  I know, sound like the same old, same old… well, what can I say, I’m sucked into it.

One thing interesting in the series which is prominently showed is how young Jenny Humprey (utmost right in photo above) dares to defy her farther, her brother, skip school all to go for her dreams, which is to be a fashion designer. At 15, she maybe the most talented fashion designer in the world to the extend her deigns are used by a major fashion label without her getting any recognition, but her father is against her, and wants her to finish school before she does pursue her interest.  Just to note, Jenny is of the lower class, living in Brooklyn with her father and brother, but going to school with the ‘rich ones’.  Her father made it a point to get them a partial scholarship so that they could get the best education in the best school where ‘rich kids’ go. (Photo below: Blair whom is gorgeous.. I have a thing for wavy haired Burnett 😛 )

I won’t tell you how it ended for Jenny, but her situation did strike me a question.

If you are a parent, or if you were a parent, would you deny your child the right to pursue what they want and happen to be talented in? I mean, lets say if you have a daughter good in singing, and she could go far and was spotted by a major label… would you home school her and let her go with her dreams?

or, would you be the traditional Malaysian which emphasis that everyone must work hard in school, get good grades, move up to the university and eventually end up working under someone in some big company/or working with the government.

The way I see it, Malaysians develop late, as in being successful after their 30’s simply because we start late in most things, for instance going for our dreams after we have only graduated or finish secondary school, while those abroad tend to be already going towards their goal in life when they are in their early twenties.

We all want something good for the future of our children, but are you willing to allow them to make their own choices when they are still in secondary school?

I believe in happiness, and I seek happiness on a daily basis.  It would be a huge relief if I could do something I really love as my job… but I know its not going to happen any time soon because I’m in my late 20’s and I think I am running out of time to waste to try new things.  After all, I wonder if anyone would actually want to hire a full time TV Series critic from Sarawak 😛

Owh.. I forgot to mention, my favorite character: Chuck Bass, a rich, manipulative, egoistic boy whom stops at nothing to get what he want, but deep down has a kind heart, and only seeks his fathers love.

6 COMMENTS

  1. Parents speak from experience, so they are there to keep us grounded. I don’t think it’s defiance if you seek to be more successful than you already are, it’s just that parents being parents don’t want to see you get hurt. I suppose the most important thing is communicating with them throughout the process, get their advice, give your opinions – basically, speak through your heart. 🙂

  2. I agree with u that us Malaysian are late in almost everything and it’s not a surprise that the generation before us (like our parent and grandparent) are more of a conventional, conservative or traditional in their way of nurturing us or even in their believe in parenthood. Conservative way of bringing up the children is in a very protective way while our generation grow up in a very open world and freedom is the main thing that we always seek. So it’s something in contra between the two generation. Some parent they can adapt to the change of the lifestyle but some cannot. Those cannot, often become overprotective of their children and want their children to follow what they (parent) think good for them while sometimes their children can’t really go with what their parent want them to be and this is where they become rebellious. Some parent even still treating their grown up children (like above 20 of age) like a small child who still need full guidance in almost everything and closely monitored them. For me this is a mistake, children will really feel like they’re not appreciated as grown ups and feel like their parent are so un-supportive, this will not make them better but rather building their ego further. Anyway what important is understanding, parent have to understand what their children need the most and be their “friend”, this way their children will not lost their believe in their parent, parent should understand that the way of life changing everyday and their children is not the same as they grow up and they will need them when they’re old. As for the children, they have to understand that their role is to be successful in whatever they want to pursue and when they’ve successful their next role is to take care of their parent.
    **err sorry bro, another long comment hehehehe can’t help it :p I’m like a cikgu kaunseling already hehehe* oh by the way, that gossip girl series sounds interesting la :p

  3. Hi Cyril! Yeah,I agree that we Malaysians/Asians start late..pros-our parents hv lived longer and knw what works and what doesnt so we can trust if they say NO to us,its for our good…cons-what might not have worked drg our parents’ time might work nw,but conventional parents close those doors before the children even get near it! I think we can trust that our parents only want what’s best for us, as do we ourselves. Its just a matter of methodology so mix and match the old way and new waz la.. :B

  4. Gallivanters:
    I agree. We should communicate with our parents. That is the best way.

    Rodz:
    Long comment? No problem bro. Vent it out. Its interesting to read comments and feedback 🙂 I also agree that parents should be more understanding towards the childs need, but not to the extend of allowing them to do anything.

    Mar:
    Yes, at this age, mix and match is the best to get the best 🙂

  5. First of all, despite you being in your late 20s it’s not too late to pursue your dreams. And I’m not saying this to be nice! Now, on to the parents thing…this is a good post Cyril. Apart from the Gossip Girl bit. Haha. Joke.

    I think Asian parents first and foremost desire security in their kids life, and if their children stray from that they’re worried. Not for them, but for their children. My parents had a hard time accepting that I’ll be doing a business degree because the conventional way in the family was either teaching, government, medical or law. Business was seen as a world very different from that. My ambition to follow my late grandfather footsteps was worrying because grandad’s life wasn’t ‘secured’ until he was quite old. But in the end, parents’ utmost wish is for us to be happy and they gave me their blessings. My parents have always let me make my own decisions, although they make it clear that my decisions worry them sometimes!

  6. Gloria:
    Yes.. I’ve noticed that some parents.. If you pursue what you want and they (the parents) see the bright side of it.. yes.. I believe they will eventually support you and be happy for you.

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